Friday, January 18, 2008

Still here.

They trimmed the palm trees outside my windows this week. You may not think that palm trees can obscure a view (if you can call the parking lot a "view") but I assure you that when the top of the tree is level with a window that Suessian poof at the top can really get in the way. I haven't seen a thing but palm leaves out my window since September. "What's the point of this?" you wonder? Well let me tell you the very first thing I saw out my window, if only I'd snapped a picture, where was my mind?

Yesterday, in the parking lot of my apartments, a man in a pink bathrobe gesturing wildly with his cigarette holder was conducting a heated conversation with two men in a gold Lincoln Navigator. Now, this was not a Navigator with a simple gold paint job, this was a a highly custom, why-god-why!? kind of paint job where the paint wasn't the color of gold but merely a clear substance gold glitter could be suspended in. This vehicle also had gold detailing and gold rims. It was like the sun became a vehicle and parked downstairs; Apollo's chariot if he was a real ostentatious 'playa', if you will. Inside this monstrosity were two men, the driver was wearing a cowboy hat and the passenger had on red and white stripes of some kind.


So I did what anyone would do when faced with such a preposterous scene: I took out the trash so I could walk by and get a closer look.

Upon further inspection I found that Guy in the Hat was clearly one of those guys who dress up in the fancy cowboy suits but has probably never even seen a cow. His hat likely cost more than a month's rent at my apartment (in California that's saying a lot), and I don't even want to speculate what is crazy, gold and gemstone bolo tie cost. The passenger was wearing a Chivas jersey. And hat. And probably pants and shoes also declaring his love for the team. (Side note: some of the Chivas jerseys have 'Bimbo' printed on them. Bimbo is kinda like Hostess. It's still hilarious to see guys walking around in their sports jerseys with the word bimbo on it though.)

The most disturbing thing of all about this scene once I got up close? The guy with the silver cigarette holder (which contained an unlit cigarette, BTW) was wearing the same fuzzy pink chenille bathrobe I have. I wonder if his aunt bought his for him, too.

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